Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Mary Poppins As A Scary Movie-Hoot


This was the very first movie I saw at a movie house. It only cost a dime to get in , in the early 60's.A Mary Poppins trailer marketing it as a horror film! Didn't see this version tho aughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

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Rent A My Space Friend WTH?


FAKE YOUR SPACE***How pathetic is this?Now you can buy friends to show off at sites like Myspace.FakeYourSpace is an exciting new service that enables normal everyday people like me and you to have Hot friends on popular social networking sites such as MySpace and FaceBook. Not only will you be able to see these Gorgeous friends on your friends list, but FakeYourSpace enables you to create customized messages and comments for our Models to leave you on your comment wall.You may be asking yourself why should you pay for something like this? Our answer to you is because it's dirt cheap. Our basic plan starts at only $.99 This will give you 2 messages per week for 4 weeks. So for only $.99 you will receive 8 messages that will be there forever, not to mention our Models picture which will show up on your friends list.

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A Rabbit's Tale


THE THREE HARES PROJECT Three hares are chasing one another in an everlasting circle. They share between them only three ears which form a triangle in the center of the design, yet each animal has two ears. The earliest known appearance of this motif is in the Mogao caves near Dunhuang, China.Along the Silk Road other sightings of the three hares are found. The hares seem to have traveled in distance and time, adapting to different religions and taking on new meanings where they settled. Recently researchers have begun seeking to answer these questions: what is the meaning of the three hares motif, where did the motif originate, and how did it spread?

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Guide To The Secret Language Of Women



Mr. Manners, I went on a blind date last night. The woman said I was "scrappy". Is that good or bad?Signed, Confused in California
Dear Gentle Reader, So often women use words men just don’t understand the meaning of. And it’s not just because females have vastly greater vocabularies then males. It’s because ladies use words in ways not found in a typical Webster’s dictionary. So when your date said you were "scrappy" she’s probably suggesting you are small and pitiful like an alley cat fighting for a twice-regurgitated grouper. So that is bad. To help guide the genteel reader in better understanding what his female companion might really be meaning when she makes such cryptic remarks, Mr. Manners would like to offer the following guide to the secret language of women.
Sensitive: This word can cut both ways. When a woman says a man is sensitive it might mean that a man is sensitive in the way that he’s prone to cry over a Barbara Striesand movie. In this situation, being sensitive is bad. However if a woman says a man is sensitive and by it means that a man actually devotes the majority of his attention to her when she is discussing her feelings that is good. So consider the context before deciding whether it’s good or not that you’re sensitive.
Fun loving: Don’t expect a call back if a woman says you are "fun loving". She’s basically saying you are irresponsible and only interested in what will bring a pleasant, tingly sensation to your nether region.
Sweet: This could well be the kiss of death. Not only does she think you are sensitive - in a bad way - but she probably thinks you are gay as well. If she realizes you are straight then it means she thinks you spend way too much time with your mother.

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You Will Be Amazed


Beautiful China- The colors are unbelievable- believe me.

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From Disturbing Auctions (Hoot)

What a mischievous little scamp! A butterfly has landed on his forehead, causing him to grin so wide that you could practically empty an entire pack's worth of ash right into his gruesomely disfigured mouth.
In fact, the seller points out, you can place a still-lit ciggie right in there and the smoke will curl up out of his ears and head -- a bonus feature that is as incongruous as it is stupid.

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Advent Calendar With Added Fun Fun Fun

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Interactive online advent calendar


http://www.harpold.com/advent/

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This is cool


All About Your Birthday - Several interesting facts about your birthdate and year.

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Monday, December 04, 2006

The Movies Just Wouldn't Be The Same



You may not know the face, but you know the voice...<<

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Get Your Own Brain Trophy

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Stunt Doubles


Going No Where Fast!
Hard economic times forces stunt double to stand in for sick horse. The once famous Bo Doubles has had a hard time finding work in his field. He had stood in for many famous celebrities to the likes of Harrison Forced, Arnold Swartskalft, Sheppard Smyth, and Madonna. Bo says even though the pay isn’t that great it is one of his hardest roll to play. “Do you have any idea how challenging this gig is to do without being noticed as a fake” stated Bo. According to Mr. Doubles they have one more opening for an experienced stunt double.
Auditions to be held on Tuesday for unfilled spot. Have your agent contact Pony’s R Us for more details.

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Sunday, December 03, 2006

It's Healthy To Sleep YIPPEEeeeeeeee



Everybody feels refreshed following a good night's sleep. But can you wake up smarter? More artistic perhaps?
German scientists say they have demonstrated for the first time that our sleeping brains continue working on problems that baffle us during the day, and the right answer may come more easily after eight hours of rest.
The German study is considered to be the first hard evidence supporting the common sense notion that creativity and problem solving appear to be directly linked to adequate sleep, scientists say. Other researchers who did not contribute to the experiment say it provides a valuable reminder for overtired workers and students that sleep is often the best medicine.
Previous studies have shown that 70 million Americans are sleep-deprived, contributing to increased accidents, worsening health and lower test scores. But the new German experiment takes the subject a step further to show how sleep can help to turn yesterday's problem into today's solution. Now when i nap I am actually doing my body good.

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New Bedtime Virus



If you receive an email entitled "Bedtimes" delete it IMMEDIATELY.
Do not open it.
Apparently this one is pretty nasty.
It will not only erase everything on your hard drive, but it will also delete anything on disks within 20 feet of your computer.
It demagnetizes the stripes on ALL of your credit cards. It reprograms your ATM access code, screws up the tracking on your VCR, and uses subspace field harmonics to scratch any CD's you attempt to play.
It will program your phone auto dial to call only 0898 numbers.
This virus will mix antifreeze into your fish tank.
It will cause your toilet to flush while you are showering.
It will drink ALL your beer.
For God's Sake, Are You Listening??
It will leave dirty underwear on the coffee table when you are expecting company.
It will replace your shampoo with Nair and your Nair with Rogaine.
If the "Bedtimes" message opened in a Windows XP environment, it will leave the toilet seat up and leave your hair dryer plugged in dangerously close to a full bathtub.
It will not only remove the forbidden tags from your mattresses and pillows, it will also refill your skim milk with whole milk.
*** WARN AS MANY PEOPLE AS YOU CAN. ***
And if you don't send this to 5000 people in 20 seconds, you'll fart so hard that your right leg will spasm and shoot straight out in front of you, sending sparks that will ignite the person nearest you.
Send this warning to everyone!!!
THERE'S A LOT OF SADNESS IN THE WORLD!
Right now, as you read this, 17 Million people are having SEX!!!And look at you….
You're on the computer!!!!
via

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****Charity *****
As Mike walked down the busy sidewalk, knowing he was late for an important interview, his eye fell upon one of those unfortunate, homeless vagabonds that are found in every city these days.
Wearing what can only be describes as rags, carrying every worldly possession in two plastic bags, his heart was touched by this persons condition.
Some people turned to stare. Others quickly looked away as if the sight would somehow contaminate them.
Recalling some long ago Sunday School admonition to "care for the sick, feed the hungry and clothe the naked," He was moved by some powerful inner urge to reach out to this unfortunate person.
Yes, where some people saw only rags, he saw a hidden beauty.
A small voice inside his head called out, "Reach out, reach out!" So he did..........
He gets out of the hospital in about 3 months. It would be nice to get a card or maybe a visitor.

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Website Counter

Online Colleges

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Even The Eagle Laughs


Will Rogers on Government & Politics ***
"I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts."
"With Congress, every time they make a joke it's a law, and every time they make a law it's a joke."
"Never blame a legislative body for not doing something. When they do nothing, that don't hurt anybody. When they do something is when they become dangerous."
"Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for."
"The trouble with practical jokes is that very often they get elected."
"The short memories of American voters is what keeps our politicians in office."
"The more you read and observe about this Politics thing, you got to admit that each party is worse than the other. The one that's out always looks the best."
"Our public men are speaking every day on something, but they ain't saying anything."
"The budget is a mythical bean bag. Congress votes mythical beans into it, and then tries to reach in and pull real beans out."
"If you ever injected truth into politics you have no politics."
"Everything is changing. People are taking the comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke."
"The income tax has made liars out of more Americans than golf."
"The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets."
"I don't want to complain, but every time they build a tax structure, the first thing they nail is me."

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Santa Recall

German shops destroy Santas giving "Hitler salute"
A German chain of shops has removed miniature wooden Santa Claus figures from its shelves and destroyed them after customers complained it looked like they were giving the stiff-armed Hitler salute that is outlawed.Josef Lange, a spokesman for the Rossmann chain that has 1,200 outlets, told Reuters on Friday the figures depicting Father Christmas with his right arm stiffly upright towards the sky and holding a sack in his left hand upset some customers."We were astonished by the reaction," Lange said. "It looks like he's just pointing up to the sky and we were surprised that anyone saw the so-called 'Hitler salute' in that. But we responded and had the entire inventory removed and destroyed."

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Saturday, December 02, 2006

On the Fourth Day Of Christmas My True Love Gave To Me 4 Whales With Hats On...

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What Do They Put In That Stuff?


WHAT'S THAT STUFF?Ever wondered about what's really in hair coloring, Silly Putty, Cheese Wiz, artificial snow or self-tanners?Here's a collection of articles that gives you a look at the chemistry behind a wide variety of everyday products.

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Friday, December 01, 2006

A Hello Kitty Christmas


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Hand Art


View Some Exquisite Handywork Here>>>>The Hand Collector.

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Some Of The Weird Stuff You Are Just A Click Away From


Weird Website Of The Day
Looking for that special gift for the holiday season?Perhaps a Dean Martin hand puppet? Wedding troll figurines?Welcome to the house of crap!

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A Very Cute Robotic Dino Critter


Pleo- Click on the word Pleo and hang on to your heartstrings as he may pull at them a little!

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Not For Kids Or Work- 18 Years Of Age And Up Only




I usually don't post this sort of thing but am fascinated by some of the artwork.JAPAN-Erotic Museums in JapanOnce upon a time...ah, lets be exact: In April 1971 Japan's first Hihokan which stands for "House of Hidden Treasures" opened its doors in Awa, Okushima. However, the exhibits where limited to phallic-vulvic altar symbols and intercourse themed antiques as you could see since centuries i
n bigger Shinto shrines anyway. via Boing Boing Two of the pictures here look westernized - hence the "Richard Nixon" and "Wimpy" the burger addict in Popeye comics.((HOOT>))

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4- year- Old Superhero Saves His Family


"Don't mess with my family." DURHAM - The robber was holding a gun to 5-year-old Mary Long's head when a 3-foot-tall Mighty Morphin Power Ranger leapt into the room.
"Get away from my family," 4-year-old Stevie Long shouted, punctuating his screams with swipes of his plastic sword and hearty "yah, yahs."
The robber and his accomplice, who was waiting outside the apartment Friday night, fled with credit cards, jewelry, cash and other items that Stevie's mother, Jennifer Long, dumped from her purse.
"I scared the bad guys away," Stevie said Tuesday evening at the apartment at 901 Chalk Level Road in north Durham.
Two men had approached Jennifer Long's boyfriend and his son Friday night as they stood outside the apartments she helps manage, according to a police report. The strangers asked for pot, and then a cigarette, and as the son went to get one, both men pulled guns, police said.
One stayed with the boyfriend as the other forced the son back into the apartment, police said. Inside were Jennifer Long, a cousin, Stevie, Mary and two other children, police said.
They were forced on the floor. The robber pointed the gun at Mary and a 1-year-old girl named Sierra, said Stevie's uncle, Bernie Evans, 33, who lives above the Longs.
Enter Stevie.
"During the robbery, a ... boy snuck into his bedroom, dressed himself in a Power Ranger costume and armed himself with a plastic sword," police said. "The child then exited his room and approached the armed suspect, in an attempt to protect his family."
Relatives said the robber abandoned plans to take Stevie's mother to an ATM to withdraw cash when he saw Stevie.
"It tripped him out, and that's when they moved on," said Evans, who did not witness the incident. Jennifer Long declined to comment, saying her employers at the apartment complex would not allow it.
Stevie likes to think he cuts an intimidating figure in his red-and-black mask and foam suit that replicates the rippling muscles of the kiddie adventure show heroes. But Evans said the robber was more startled that Stevie was able to retreat to his bedroom and morph.
Fantasy, reality
Though the robbers wore no masks, victims could only give vague descriptions of them. Police have no suspects in this or the other 10 armed robberies reported in Durham in the past six days, said Kammie Michael, a spokeswoman.
Evans said family members are struggling to help their children understand their ordeal. A counselor said Stevie needs to improve his distinction between fantasy and reality, said Heather Evans, Stevie's aunt.
"He fully believed he morphed," she said.
Mary grasps her danger better. She stayed home from school Monday and Tuesday.
"My doctor said I get a day off," she said.
"My mommy said I was crying in my sleep because I had bad dreams."
Staff writer Matt Dees can be reached at 956-2433 or matt.dees@newsobserver.com.

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When You're Smilin'



SPOT THE FAKE SMILE. An experiment designed to test whether you can spot the difference between a fake smile and a real one.You will see 20 video clips that will play only once.It's your task to tell whether the person's smile was a fake or a real one.

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Pongo Clay Art


PONGOMANIA. Pongo is a sort of clay you can mould into anything you want.It's originally from Italy and it's different from the stiff old clay you may remember from your childhood.Pongo is very flexible, it only needs a hand to warm it and the colors are very bright.This site shows al kinds of creatures made from Pongo. (7212)(via The G Spot)

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Nature Past and Present




DINOSAUR SOUNDS.Listen as voices from a distant past breathe new life. Also whales, storms, and dinosaurs.

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A Party Favor?




A lady is throwing a party for her granddaughter, and had gone all out... a caterer, band, and a hired clown. Just before the party started, two bums showed up looking for a handout. Feeling sorry for the bums, the woman told them that she would give them a meal if they will help chop some wood for her.Gratefully, they headed to the rear of the house.The guests arrived, and all was going well with the children having a wonderful time. But the clown hadn't shown up. After a half an hour, the clown finally called to report that he was stuck in traffic, and would probably not make the party at all.The woman was very disappointed and unsuccessfully tried to entertain the children herself. She happened to look out the window and saw one of the bums doing cartwheels across the lawn. She watched in awe as he swung from tree branches, did midair flips, and leaped high in the air.She spoke to the other bum and said, "What your friend is doing is absolutely marvelous. I have never seen such a thing. Do you think your friend would consider repeating this performance for the children at the party? I would pay him $50!"The other bum says, "Well, I dunno. Let me ask him -HEY WILLIE! FOR $50, WOULD YOU CHOP OFF ANOTHER TOE?"

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Actual Student Essays -So Funny



Supposedly taken from actual high school essays and collected by English teachers across the country for their own amusement. Some of these kids may have bright futures as humor writers. What do you think?
1. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a ThighMaster.
2. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.
3. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.
4. She grew on him like she was a colony of E. Coli, and he was room-temperature Canadian beef.
5. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.
6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.
7. He was as tall as a six-foot, three-inch tree.
8. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife’s infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM machine.
9. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn’t.
10. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.
11. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you’re on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.
12. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.
13. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.
14. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.
15. They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan’s teeth.
16. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
17. He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant, and she was the East River.
18. Even in his last years, Granddad had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long it had rusted shut.

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Pheasant Attacks Postal Lady


A rather unpleasant pheasant *****
Delivering mail to the dozen homes of the hamlet of Lowesby should be a simple task. But Jackie Chadwick's round has turned into a running battle thanks to a very fiery pheasant. Each morning he attacks the hapless postwoman and sometimes her van too. Known to locals as Freddie, the pheasant pursues her from door to door pecking her when he can get close enough. He enjoys his sport so much that he has taken to waiting next to Lowesby's post box for Mrs Chadwick to arrive.May be a clever dog in a bird suit too. Who knows these days.

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Stand Aside Jaws There's Something Even Scarier Out There


First JAWS, Now You Won't Be Able to Bear It!!!By Steve On The BeachThere is a creature alive today that has survived years of evolution. Without change, passion or logic, it is a killing machine. It is as if God created the devil and gave him claws.There is something on the beach that is harassing swimmers, who can no longer enjoy the sea and the sand. A Great Black Bare decides to make this beach resort town his private feeding grounds, and residents are exclaiming: "there goes the neighborhood!". Just when you thought it wasn't safe from the sharks to go out into the water, now you'll never get out of the water again because it's a bare beach.The bare (or bares) seems to have developed a newfound aggressiveness. Lance Corporal Gunny, a Marine Biologist, speculates that these bares are "really by polar." "These bares just appear to be black bares, because they have a really dark suntan," volunteered Lance.About a month ago one bare over charged a couple jogging on the beach for sun screen.In a separate incident last week, a large hairy male bare attacked and injured one dog, named Snookums, and then kicked sand in the face of a second dog, named Pooter, who is now missing and presumed to be smelly.Most residents have a grizzly horror story such as bares stealing surf boards, sex wax and pooping on sand castles.Normally, a beach bare will avoid humans while quietly drinking his cans of beer. When this street reporter suggested that the new "NO GOING BARE ON THE BEACH" sign may be pissing the bares, he was quickly given the finger and a harsh retort that "bares can't spell!"Remember: if you have an encounter on a bare beach, never make direct eye contact. The bares interpret direct eye contact as a sign of low self esteem, loser.

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A New Milton Bradley Bored Game



*****TOYLAND, CALIFORNIA - Today toy giant, Milton Bradley, announced their newest bored game. It will be called SORRY DUDE!™ With special features like Crash, Pad, and Whoa, it’s still just a remake of old SORRY™ which has been redesigned for today’s stoner generation in mind. Other games available later this season include NO RISK DUDE™, SCRAMBLE MAN™ , MONOPOLY DUDE™, and NO CLUE DUDE

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A Talking Frog



Talking Frog
******A man was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess". He bent over, picked up the frog, and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will tell everyone how smart and brave you are and how you are my hero. I'll stay with you for a year and do ANYTHING you want". The man took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it, and returned it to his pocket. The frog then cried out, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess, I'll stay with you for a year and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?" The man said, "Look, I'm a computer programmer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog is cool".

http://home.bellsouth.net/p/pwp-planetfootey

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