Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Local Daschund Vainly Attempts To Fight Off Reputation As A Silly Little Weiner Dog

Once a weiner, always a weiner!ANDOUILLE, IL - Andouille, Illinois, Daschund "Shatzi" reportedly has "apparently been trying to fight off the long established stigma of the breeds resemblance to a walking weiner with silly little spindly legs", according to the dogs owner, Lyssa Honeyhamm. "He's my brave little man." Boasted Honeyhamm "He doesn't take balonie from any dog, anywhere, anytime. Rottweilers, Pit Bulls and even Badgers can't push him around. If he's supposed to be the comedian of the canine world, he sure doesn't know it!" Tales told of Shatzi attacking neighborhood dogs sometimes 10 times his size and weight. It isn't clear what is driving the combative canine chorizo into such seemingly suicidal fits, but events have shown him to usually come out on the kraut end of the kebab."One time he nipped at a Mastiff, and wound up getting tossed in the air like Miss Piggy. Another time a Golden grabbed him by the head and clomped until his eyes almost bugged out. I'm not sure what it will take for him to learn his lesson, or even why he's doing it. You have to say a lot for him, though. He's one tough little Kielbasa. I think people can learn something from Shatzi, that no matter what your size or reputation is, you can stand up and fight for yourself. There's an important lesson to be gleaned here, I suppose." The most important lesson for Honeyhamm, however, was that vet bill after vet bill would continue to pour in as Shatzi repeatedly relished pickling fights way out of his tare weight, and ceaselessly continued to get his little Bockwurst-in-a-bun ass kicked half way to Wisconsin Cheddar and back.

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