Tuesday, January 09, 2007

Lottery Winner Is Surprised To Make New Friends- Well Duhhh

Monroe Cortez is busy answering his phone today. Monroe was the winner of last week's Lotto in South Carolina, and ever since his name appeared in the Hartsville newspaper: The Messenger, Monroe has been trying to figure out why so many of his old acquaintances are coming out of the woodwork."People are all calling me and stuff," Monroe said, "It's pretty weird."Monroe won close to Seven Thousand dollars, most of which will go toward rebuilding old friendships. "I've done some pretty dumb things to a LOT of people, so I figure I can start paying them back with my winnings." Among those people are an ex-wife, his sister Miranda, and his ex-best friend Gary, who used the be the boyfriend of his ex-wife. All three have called Monroe in the last 24 hours. Other friends that have called are Big Steve Michigan, a bail bondsman, Fran Tyler, the owner of the local bar, and Fenmore Rowdy, his one time friend and bookie. "It's like I have friends again," comments Cortez, "I think it's time to celebrate my new-old life!" Monroe also plans on moving to Mills, South Carolina, an exclusive resort-like community known for its golf course and famed "Millionare Row," where Cortez plans to build a two bed-two bathroom aprtment, an exact replica of the apartment his mom owned when he grew up. "I don't know how much I can stretch the Seven G's," said Monroe, "but I said screw it! I'm gonna live high on the hog for a while."

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