Bumper Snickers

Save the trees.... Wipe your butt with an owl.
Honk if you've never seen an Uzi fired from a car window .
Seen on the back of a biker's vest: If you can read this, my wife fell off.
Fight Crime: Shoot Back!
If you can read this, please flip me back over... (seen upside down,on a Jeep)
Please tell your pants it's not polite to point.
A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the ass.
Never raise your hands to your kids; it leaves your groin unprotected.
Feel safe tonight ... Sleep with a cop.
Remember folks: Stop lights timed for 35mph are also timed for 70mph
GUYS: No shirt, no service. GALS: No shirt, no charge.
If walking is so good for you, then why does my mailman look like Jabba the Hut??
Impotence: Nature's way of saying "No hard feelings"
I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.
We have enough youth, how about a fountain of smart?
Axe me about Ebonics
Boldly going nowhere

CAUTION - Driver legally blonde
Don't be sexist - broads hate that!
Eat Well, Stay Fit, Die Anyway
He's not dead, He's electroencephalographically challenged
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you
If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, riddle them with bullets
If you lived in your car, you'd be home by now
WARNING! Driver only carries $20.00 in ammunition
What has four legs and an arm? A happy pit bull.
Keep honking, I'm reloading.